Finley

I dedicated my 14-mile run today to a beautiful boy, Finley.  I saw more animals on this run than I ever had before and I’m honored that I could carry Finley’s spirit with me to see them.  I saw three foxes, deer, a number of rabbits, and more birds than I could count.  I even had a little white butterfly follow me for a good portion of my journey through the backwoods.  I am touched that sweet Finley’s spirit brought all of these animals across my path.  It warmed my heart that nature was buzzing with such vigorous activity while the rest of humankind was still asleep.

Since Finley brought so many animals to me, I was moved to take his picture near the horses along one of my favorite stretches in the backwoods.  This horse was so gentle and was very curious about my presence.  I think it was Finley’s company that brought the horse so close. 

As the miles went on and my body grew challenged, I gained strength from Finley’s strong mother, Mel Scott.  She is an author and has shared Finley’s story with the world in her book, “After Finley” and continues to do incredible outreach and education through her website, Finley’s Footprints.  Her book is described as: “Frank, insightful and moving, After Finley is an unexpectedly captivating book that gets right to the heart of the meaning of love.” 

With me, she shared this about her story: 

"On August 2nd 2009 my life totally changed. My waters broke at 41+5 weeks, I went to the hospital and there was meconium in my waters so they kept me in. They sent my husband home, as I wasn’t having contractions yet. Sadly things deteriorated, and his heart rate started dropping. I had to have emergency surgery and I woke up to the news that I had a baby boy, but that he would never wake up.

We spent 3 days in hospital as a family, making many memories.

That little lad will soon be 6, but it feels simultaneously like yesterday and like a lifetime ago. He has changed my life, and inspires people worldwide, who read his story, attend my study days or receive support from my charity."

My heart is with Mel and the many other parents who have to leave the hospital with their baby in their heart instead of in their arms.  Mel’s love for Finley is so potent and powerful, and I truly felt that today. 

I was graced by the presence of beautiful animals and nature while running with Finely.  When I needed strength I reached into my vest pocket, close to my heart, and held his shell.  I am honored to have shared my morning with Finley and to post about his legacy.  His mother, Mel Scott, inspires me to keep putting one foot in front of the other and complete each mile with love. 

About run to heal:

I run to heal.  It’s where I learn to hold my grief in my heart as love.  It’s where I practice putting one foot in front of another.  It’s where I honor Quinn and other babies who are gone too soon from stillbirth, miscarriage, or neonatal death.  In preparation for my first Mother’s Day as a parent to both a living and dead child, I asked my friends and community to dedicate a workout to Quinn.  This was a powerful, soulful, and healing experience.  I felt lifted up and loved by the community.  I was humbled that so many people carried Quinn’s spirit with them.  I hope to accompany others on their journey after child loss and hold them and their son or daughter in my heart.  It is an opportunity for me to honor their child and learn their story.  Together, we will learn how to put one foot in front of the other and run to heal.  Dedicate a run here.